Victory Is Mine! Neck Beard goes google!

To my unborn daughter / son...

VICTORY IS MINE!!!

Today, and maybe any day from this day forward until the end of time, (or the end of the internet - whichever comes first?) when you type NECK BEARD into google images - you will see your old dad looking fondly back at you like a demented freaking leprechaun!

Yes, you will scroll down and see (on the same search-page as your old dad) a few people you may have seen before...

Only Willy Wonka & That kid from Transformers! (I didn't know 12 year olds could grow neck beards? The effects they create in Hollywood these days!)

 

Only the great Jack Nicholson! (On a bender!) and Hollywood's most prolific pants man - George Clooney (A.K.A the JOKER & BATMAN!!! - Your mum will really love that one!)

Only the most famous footballer on the planet, Becks! (Although, as I will tell you every day for the rest of your life - AFL is the only football that real men play! Jimmy Bartel should be your real football hero!)

 

 

Introducing - Angelina's better half... Brad!

And Indiana Jones - my first Hollywood Hero!!! (I will never forget seeing Raiders of the Lost Ark as a 12 year old boy at the Village Twin in Geelong!!!)

 

 

Yes, its safe to say, daddy is famous. And may well be for the rest of eternity - considering these guys who must have uploaded their neck beard photos 150million years ago and they are still on there to this day!!!

Even Ex U.S. Presidents come up on the same google search page as your dad!

This guy uploaded an oil painting of himself! (Proving once and for all that google was around before photography!)

 

Fashion hey - here I was thinking I was being original, and yet - two hundred years ago these guys were rocking the Neck Beard like they invented it...

And they probably did!

My advice to you - forget fashion - don't be a slave - rock out your own style with the safe knowledge that even though you think you are being 100% original - its probably been done before!

 

And beware - although I have been showing off about being famous and being on google with some of the greats of all time, (and lets be honest - its a pretty tidy line up of legends!) there are also followers out there who can be found on my google page too... Guys like this...

 

Crazed Ginger Neck Beard (IRA Bomber)

 

Ahhh, The Dutch! Home of windmills, Neck Beards and high quality over the counter Weed!

WTF?

Even a girl made it to the Neck Beard page!

 

Moral of the story, unborn Spawn...

a) Fashion is a massive crock and we don't follow!

b) Being famous is fun for about thirty seconds.  There are those heady days when you find yourself hanging out with the brat pack drinking Dry Martinis with Jack Nicholson and playing wingman to George Clooney in the VIP section of an exclusive Manhatten Nightclub...

Then, "BAM!"

The next thing you know, you are just one of the rest of us trying to make ends meet and build a better life for your (unborn) children!

 

I shaved the neck beard off today.